A run-on sentence rant

Sometimes I have spanish tests on thursdays that I haven't really studied for and don't want to study for but also that I don't want to fail miserably at but still can't find the motivation to study for because i'm really beginning to not like spanish slash learning any language which has made me wonder if I really want to learn a language on my mission cause just think how much easier it would be to serve an english mission I wouldn't need to learn a language I could articulate exactly what I wanted to whenever I wanted to and I wouldn't have to go through the pain and anguish of learning a language I mean I understand that I will have the Holy Ghost as my helper so it would come a lot faster than a regular class but what if I had to learn Mong or any other language from the continent of Asia even though some people now are calling it eurasia which is so weird to me but anyway it would just be insane and i'm not saying that I think i'm going to go foreign or that I think i'm going to learn a difficult language because for all I know I could go to Kansas which thinking about it lately I think I would be totally okay with that but seriously there's no reason for me to start thinking about where i'm going to serve because my mission papers aren't even in yet even though i've done everything that I needed to do except that I forgot to sign a form so I just did that this past sunday but my papers still aren't in so i'm beginning to worry that they wont be put in forever which means I wont get my call forever which also probably means that I wont leave forever which not knowing what i'll be doing next year really scares me especially because housing contracts go up for sale soon and I just don't want to have to worry about it on top of all the things I have to worry about like teaching class next friday because the professor wont be there and I honestly don't know why I even agreed to teach I feel like none of the students really respect my TA-ness mostly cause I look like i'm 16 and because they all make me nervous and less confident I mean really give me a break I did well in this class last semester so I know my stuff just give me a chance sheesh and now i've wasted about an hour of study time that I could have had for spanish but I just can't bring myself to do it.

This was a really ranty post talking about myself, but I don't apologize. It's good to rant every now and then, in my opinion.

Love,

Carolina

Comments

  1. Oh Carolina, if only you could see yourself from the world's perspective!!!! Let me give you a glimpse. You're honestly one of the smartest people I know, and I think you could learn a language a lot quicker than you allow yourself to think you can. Also, think of the richness it will fill your life with. And that's so cool you're teaching a lecture! Eat it up for all it's worth, and don't think about other's opinions of you. There's no use and things always seem to go better when you just decide to be yourself, no matter what other people think!
    So, basically, I believe in you! And the whole world does too! You should too :)
    Love ya!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, you're a wonderful friend slash person slash life-form. What you said really does mean a lot :)

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